One day, many years ago, God took up knitting. And what He knitted was… you.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” Psalm 139:13-14
You are the only you God ever created. He literally broke the mold after He designed you. No other person can compete with the person you are, because you are like no other. So it is safe and right for you to be authentic, even in your most difficult, complicated relationships.
I understand complicated relationships. 24 years ago, the one I love inserted me into a new family. I formed a protective shell around my tender heart, to keep me safe from those who refused at first to accept me. I was my fully authentic self only when around those who loved me. But I was a completely different person — smiling, yet guarded and very stiff — when with those who didn’t.
Then I realized a Great Truth: God designed me to be me. Whether accepted or rejected, I must do life with others as me. Glorify Him as me. Make life’s mistakes as me. Interact and witness to others — to all others — as me.
Is there someone in your life who does not see the world through the same lens as you? Who does not love you, support you, understand you, or even want to try? When a relationship seems impossible, it’s very tempting to hide. Or to exit. But this is not a viable option. Because our relationships are not random. They have been orchestrated by the Father, before all time. Some relationships presently seem a blessing, others a curse. Some relationships delight us, sharpen us, while others almost break us. But the Word of God assures that what feels punishing is not necessarily punishment. Neither we nor they know the heavenly outcome of these human encounters.
We cannot imagine how God can fit certain circumstances into a “pattern for good”. (See Romans 8:28). But He will. Right now, we see through a glass darkly. The exquisite heavenly pattern will be crystal clear when we finally see Him face to face.
In the difficult meantime, God has specifically instructed us not to be conformed to the pattern of this world. Not to let the world “squeeze us into its own mold”. (see Romans 12:2). For if we melt and mold our unique personalities to suit resistant others, we make a mockery of the uniqueness of our ordained life on earth.
Are you having a tough time at school, at work, or in a blended home? In a new job, in a new marriage, or in a new neighborhood? Whether embraced or scorned… Stay on mission. Seek to be genuine. Authentic. True. Acceptance in any circle — of family, of friends, or of work associates — may take time. Do not lose yourself during that time, for God’s workmanship does not need to tweak itself to suit the tastes of resistant others. You are who God made you to be — who God needs you to be.
Give the world your best, to be sure. But make certain it is your authentic life you are giving. Life is not a play and you are not an actor. Be true to you, dear one, for you are worth everything.